I know how pathetic this is going to make me sound but I’ve decided to come clean and admit I am addicted to Solitaire; the computer versions. On my desktop I have the normal game and the one called Spider Solitaire and I swear, as soon as I go on to start working I inevitably click on one of them, play a few rounds, click on the other one and play a few rounds and believe me, it’s getting harder to click out of them and actually do something constructive.
Thing is, I don’t know how to stop! I realise I could be substituting one addiction for another because with all the kids moved out now, I have no one to play Scrabble with until they pop home for a visit (when we Scrabble till we’re scrambled!) but when it’s all said and done, it’s a pretty lame excuse. Nevertheless, I’m coming out and owning it and acknowledge that I need to develop some willpower and Not, I repeat N.O.T. click on those icons!
But it’s easier said than done. In a fit of determination though, the last time I was on my computer I took several deep breaths, counted to 20 or something (10 being totally not long enough) and forced myself to ignore the lure of those Solitaire icons and go immediately into Word and it felt really good! Except for the bit where I sat staring at an empty page because I couldn’t think of a single thing to write because all I could think about were those little card games. I suppose it would sound better if I was claiming an addiction to one of the more exciting action type games but then I’d be lying through my teeth. Addicts do that and I’m trying to hang on to my moral sense here so I can’t lie and claim an addiction to something people would have an easier time understanding. With me it’s Solitaire. There. I’ve said it.
But the funny thing is, I have never been addicted to playing it with actual cards! To be honest I don’t think I ever have so what gives with the computer versions? I have no idea but just the thought of getting on and playing is really exciting. See what I mean about pathetic? Like, who gets all excited about playing card games on computers? Maybe I should be worried about this…
On the other hand, maybe not, because let’s face it there are worse addictions out there. Like rabid cravings for things such as soap operas, reality TV shows and blokey sports or those ghastly sour lollies and if I stop to think about it, getting all breathless at the thought of playing computer Solitaire is pretty tame compared to any of those so maybe I shouldn’t be feeling so ashamed of myself after all. Slightly mortified maybe, even embarrassed to a degree but not ashamed.
Well at least I’m honest. I even feel “cleansed” somehow for having come out of the closet and one day I might even tell my children about the Solitaire thingy. I’m sure they’ll understand but they’ll probably ask me not to tell anyone else. Uh oh…I just have.
Don’t let on that I told you, okay!